Remember Me

Doubt thou the stars are fire,

Doubt that the sun doth move,

Doubt truth to be a liar,

But never doubt I love.

Prayer

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God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can;

and wisdom to know the difference.

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Within

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I hear this sound,

the words with no melody,

he hums in my ears a symphony

and gives me the song of the day

The sunshine do not help,

when the red green eyes stare at me,

he come, hold me from the back,

don't let me fall

And since the day I am what I am,

he never left me to walk alone,

I had him in coldest and darkest of nights

and when the morning light explode

It was always me and him,

against this big, strange, odd world

my solitude, my friend

I owe this one to you

:)

He and his Annabel..

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It was many and many a year ago,

In a kingdom by the sea,

That a maiden there lived whom you may know

By the name of Annabel Lee;

And this maiden she lived with no other thought

Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,

In this kingdom by the sea;

But we loved with a love that was more than love-

I and my Annabel Lee;

With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven

Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,

In this kingdom by the sea,

A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling

My beautiful Annabel Lee;

So that her highborn kinsman came

And bore her away from me,

To shut her up in a sepulchre

In this kingdom by the sea.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love

Of those who were older than we-

Of many far wiser than we-

And neither the angels in heaven above,

Nor the demons down under the sea,

Can ever dissever my soul from the soul

Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.

For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams

Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;

And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes

Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;

And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side

Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride,

In the sepulcher there by the sea,

In her tomb by the sounding sea.

- Edgar Allan Poe

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When you have 'lot of' milk to boil...

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Its 6:00pm and am done with my dinner and the day. As am not sleepy, I have to figure out my options. Am not much of a TV person, not at all actually and am kinna sick of Internet and laptop cause am doing that for a continues 22 hrs now. I see these ppl walking down the white street and some kids skating, Its beautiful out of my window but I wonder how past week went.

Truth is, I miss him :( . I miss him when i have to eat that crap food on my own, or when I didn't understand things on my computer or when I see some stupid nightmare and I don't have him by my side to cuddle into or when I walk alone to office and its cold. :(

Every single, most insignificant thing of my day reminds me how better that could be if he would be here.
I am not sure if its gonna get better. Its still amazing how I have no regrets of making this choice. Yes am scared to death and I need patience and faith. Cause he told me once, this is what we do.... we stir it, every now and then, to save it to get stick to the bottom of the pan and get burnt.

About some lost and founds in life...

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I have not been regular on the blog lately. Not because I don't have things to say, but because I am no more brave enough to confess. I think we all agree, it takes alot to admit things.

Life is all gray and ppl often judge you for what you say or write. It take a lot of courage to come out and be honest.

I have been thinking this alot lately, and so I think it deserves a place here.

I was talking to 'A' the other day. He never fail to amaze me with his dreams, honesty, conviction and stories about a whole different world with different set of ppl. And he that day, told me something which his senior once told him

"Never loose something you already have to get something you want". :)

I am kinna hooked to these words since.

The sentence is a very pure and genuine advice and it will take alot to follow it.

If you ask me, I have traded a lot of things in life. I traded a lot of things for my education and job. I traded many old friends for the new ones. I even traded my mom and dad for this new married life.
I don't know if it was all worth of and I cant even say for sure if I'll ever stop doing it cause these words are just too difficult for me to live with. Wish I had the strength. Wish I would be good enough.

Here I am, Wishing you all a very Happy Diwali and a prosperous new year. And I will not expect the idol strength in you to follow these words, but I'll hope they give you a perspective and I'll pray, you guys make the right trade offs in life... :)

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I did that before, I can do it again...

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the Pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll.

I am the master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul.

- Invictus by William Ernest Henley